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Sunday, September 30th, 2007
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4:56 pm
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Zach and I went to Lowes today and priced everything out for the house we are buying until the point of utter exhaustion. Utter exhaustion is pretty easy to accomplish when you see thousands of dollars fly out of your savings account. Thank God we have a savings account to begin with or we would have to do renovations every other Thursday when we both get our paychecks. The moral of today's Lowes story is that remodeling a kitchen is extremely expensive!!! I had no idea that a refrigerator would cost $900. That is just insanity. Installing new appliances alone is the majority of our budget for updating this house. Its really unbelieveable... but really worth it because the current appliances are really shabby. I'm hoping that we will at least be able to get something for them when I try to sell them in the paper!
We are probably going to be closing on the house this week which makes me really excited because I can't wait to put new gutters on. I never thought i would be excited about gutters!! When I was at work the other day I was looking in thew newspaper at houses for sale just for fun and I found an EXACT REPLICA of the house we bought that was fixed up like we want to fix ours up... selling for DOUBLE what we are buying our house for. Not only that but its two streets away from where our house is. Yay! It's very very likely that we can make like a $40,000 profit. Shizam, that's medical school. :)
current mood:  cheerful
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| Sunday, September 2nd, 2007
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11:46 am
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Jennie and Craig left yesterday afternoon which fully sucks. I feel far away from everyone again. Zach is on call and at the hospital doing his thing ... I have no idea when he'll be home. I hate when he is on call because we both never know when he will have a chance to come home or how long he can stay. I've been looking at medical schools for him and trying to plot where he can get in and how close it all is to Connecticut. I need to be near family while he is in school! Not only for my comfort's sake but also because I have no idea how long we can wait to have babies! Jennie and I already decided that late 2010 we are both getting pregnant. That means Zach will be entering his third year of medical school when we have a little babums and we are going to need grandma to babysit because I'll have to work. I don't care if anyone thinks that it is extreme to try to plan this all out, I feel the need. It would be great to be able to wait a little longer than that... Zach won't start having an income until his residency so it will be rough to try to support us on a nurse's salary. Another question that is always burning is am I going to go to Grad school to become a Nurse Practitioner?? I know that I would enjoy having my own practice or working per diem in the ER but is it okay to invest all the time and energy towards something that I don't want more than anything? What I want more than anything is to have a big family and a big kitchen.. to knead dough and frolick around town running errands. Would that get insanely boring? I would obviously choose to work at least once or twice a week to remain sane... it would be financially better if I were an advance practice nurse. When am I going to go back to school? It would be great to find a part-time option to have class once or twice a week and work three twelve hour shifts. I could manage that while Zach is in medical school and still support us. Most hospitals pay close to 100% for nurse education...
Balrh, I don't know!! There's no easy answer and no matter what it's gonna be tough! I think I'll continue to research medical school and see if any of the schools have decent graduate options for me....
current mood:  contemplative
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| Wednesday, July 25th, 2007
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5:41 pm - and they lived happily ever after
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Well, I'm married. :)
Everything in my life right now is pretty much perfect and fairy tale. I am so happy and fulfilled that I have no idea what to do with myself. I go to work to a job i freaking love and can barely believe they pay me for it... and to top it all off I come home to the man of my dreams. The funny thing about being madly in love is that, for me, being this much in love and happy is exactly on the same nerve ending in my brain as wanting BABIES. It's so ridiculous to want them right now because it's totally the wrong moment, we aren't ready, and we are too young for that. BUT my brain is pumping out oxytocin and begging me to get pregnant. Unfortunatly for the oxytocin, the birth control is the boss right now. :) But really- I can wait, I'm just very excited. Seriously, Zach is so handsome and perfect, who wouldn't want to have his babies?! :)
Talking about Zach, he's going to medical school. Now the question is where? We have the choice of the caribbean next year or a US school the year after that. I'm not sure what his decision will be but it doesn't matter at all to me. Ofcourse I would rather have him go to a US school... i just mainly want him to be happy and I know that he will be as an MD. Doctor and Nurse Betters, thats pretty porno-rific and hey! It's not a sin anymore!! :) So we re-evalued our plan for having a family and it looks like no matter where he goes to school it will be in about 2-3 years. Yay! So for right now our baby Belle is going to the be the only dog slash child in our lives. hehe
But yea, super happy, super excited about live.. and even more excited to get our weddig pictures and video back from production!!!!
current mood:  loved
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| Friday, July 6th, 2007
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11:22 pm
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Oh it's what you do to me..
A thousand miles seems pretty far
But they've got planes and trains and cars
I'd walk to you if I had no other way
Our friends would all make fun of us
and we'll just laugh along because we know
That none of them have felt this way <3
That by the time we get through
The world will never ever be the same
Wedding day in 24 hours.. :)
current mood:  ecstatic
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| Tuesday, June 19th, 2007
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8:26 pm - I have all i've waited for...
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I can't help but feel completely on cloud nine right now. I am so happy! I feel like all my dreams are coming true before my eyes! I've finished college, I've landed my dream job, I've passed my boards and am officially a registered nurse, I'm getting married in 18 days to this incredible guy... that is really what I am the happiest about. I couldn't imagine being with anyone else. Every second that we are together I am reminded how we are literally the other's half. I feel like a whole person. He makes me complete.. and not only just complete.. he brings out these incredible feelings and makes me a better person. He understands me to a level I don't even understand myself. We can speak volumes to each other with a look or a smile from across the room. No matter what is happening that day sitting next to him brightens everything and he can make me laugh in the middle of a sob. I am literally filthy rich with love.
Sometimes I have to remind myself that it is true, that we really did find each other. This isn't a dream. I'm not 12 years old in Jennie's room dreaming up the men we are going to marry... :) I can't wait for every day of the rest of my life!
current mood:  happy
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| Sunday, June 17th, 2007
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8:58 pm
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So I'm pretty much the luckiest girl ever. Yesterday Zach threw me a surprise birthday party at my neighbor's house for passing my boards!!! I had NO IDEA! He was like "lets go for a walk" and i said "definately not." I was feeling crappy and sick and didn't want to go outside. Finally he forced me into it and we were walking around kind of aimlessly waiting for the dog to pee and then he said "Lets stop by Tayrn and Karisa's .. I want to ask Mike when we are golfing." So we ring the door bell and then everyone yells SURPRISE!! and i was like whaaaaaaaaaaaat? What's the surprise? haha I was so confused! We drank some wine and had a cook out.. .It was really fun! :)
I have the best sweetums ever!!!
I'm so happy the boards are over with. I can finally relax! Hopefully I'll get over this cold soon, its extremely unattractive :P
By the way.. getting married in 20 DAYS! Yay
current mood: extreme happiness
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| Thursday, June 14th, 2007
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8:22 pm - Yayyy
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Today was my first day on the floor as an RN. I got to tell all my patients (6) that I would be their nurse (along with another nurse that was training me). I got to do a lot of discharge teaching, medication teaching, dressing changes, IV changes, CHARTING!!! WITH RN AFTER MY NAME!! I learned a lot about the unit after just 8 hours. I am so excited to go tomorrow again and even more excited to finally progress to the ICU in 3-4 weeks. My preceptor said I did a really good job today so I am hoping that maybe I can move to the ICU faster?
Anyway- its so weird to not have anything to worry. I got out of work, ran a couple errands, came home, cleaned/laundried, watched TV for half an hour... and now dinner is in the oven just waiting for Zach to come home to be served to. Like... this is life! So strange. I do have bad news though.. because I have been so stressed and insane for the past month over working and the NCLEX, I am now sick. Balrh!
current mood: happy
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| Wednesday, June 13th, 2007
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6:31 pm - Stephanie, RN
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I passed my boards!!!! I am a REGISTERED NURSE!!!
ahhh!!!! yayyyy!!!
It's so surreal and crazy... it really hasn't totally hit me yet.. I have LETTERS after my name!!!! eeeeeeee!
I'm so happy!
I enjoy the huge "RN" so you can spot me from afar!! :)
current mood: ecstatic
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| Monday, June 11th, 2007
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2:08 pm - Ohh Lord!
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So I just got back from taking the NCLEX!! It shut off at 75 questions! This means I did really good or REALLY bad. Statistically though, if it shuts off at 75 you have a better chance of passing than failing! Keep your fingers crossed for me!! ahhh!
I'm so glad it's over. Now begins stalking the internet to see if I passed. haha
current mood:  calm
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| Friday, June 8th, 2007
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3:59 pm - I'm a graduate nurse!!
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Okay. So the NCLEX is on Monday. 3 days away.
I just finished my Kaplan course today and I'm still feeling really ambivalent! I passed my diagnostic exam and then I passed my readiness test with just a difference of 6 more questions right. I'm so scared for Monday!! I'm the first in my class to take it so it really freaks me out not having someone to freak out to that can just tell me what the test is like. I honestly just HAVE to calm down about it. I'm freaking myself out so much and getting really, really anxious. Argh! It just this test is so important! I got my dream job in the ICU based on the fact that they think I am very knowledgeable and if I fail this test I feel that they will lose all faith in me since it is supposed to be basic knowledge.
On a good note; today I got my official "nurse" badge to wear around the hospital. It doesn't say staff nurse but it's as close as it gets!! I went scrub shopping after Kaplan and that cheered me up a little about the upcoming boards... I just want to be a nurse SO BADLY. I don't have a choice. I have to pass it. No pressure or anything though!!!
PS: getting married in less than a month!!! (26 days!!)
current mood:  nervous
current music: Fergie- Glamorous
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| Thursday, May 31st, 2007
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12:02 pm - "Cuz whens theres you, I feel whole and there's no better feeling in the world"
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So here I am again. Sitting around waiting for time to go by. I can't say enough that I hate having nothing to do. I mean, this is my week off before craziness... i should be rejoicing! Honestly, I'm just tired of having nothing to do but sit around and lay in the sun. It would be better if at least Zach was here to sit around with but hes at work! I've been studying alot... 100 questions a day which sounds insane.
I CAN NOT WAIT for this weekend. It's my bridal shower and bachlorette party!!! Eekk!! It's going to be so much fun! I can't wait to hang out with all my girls. I have no idea what we are doing for either of the parties but I have a feeling it wouldn't matter! :) It kinda sucks that me and Zach are going to be away from eachother Friday and Saturday.. he's having his Bachlor party the same time I'm having my Bachlorette party. The whole concept is kinda lame but it will be fun for both of us to hang out with our friends/family for the weekend. I'll miss him though. We talked about phone call minimums and that we HAVE to talk that night. haha I'm a little worried because his brother is the best man and he is insane + not so happily married. Awwwesome.
2 wedding appointments this weekend:
Friday : Hair
Sat 11am: Flowers
Lalalalalaaaaaaaa
current mood:  busy
current music: Michelle Branch- I'd Rather Be in Love
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| Tuesday, May 22nd, 2007
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8:00 am - "Oh gravity- stay the hell away from me"
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I am up and "at 'em" at 8am.. studying for the NCLEX. I woke up in a fantastic mood and feel like a brand new person today! I called the newspaper just a second ago to pay for my engagement announcement and they aren't open until 8:30, this was strange to me since I am rising and shining like a supernova while everyone else is sleeping. Zach left for work about half an hour ago which sucks because I definately could have gone for a couple of hours rolling around laughing. I wonder what its going to feel like to look over at him and see him wearing a wedding ring... magic? Can I tell you that I explode inside with joy every time I think about wearing mine! Lalala.
Talking about wedding stuff; updates. We PAID IN FULL for our honeymoon officially today. SHIEYES. And I picked up the fixed programs from the printer yesterday and they look great. Halleluja.
I need to get this much sleep more often because it feels so great to wake up and not want to mush myself into bed forever.
Back to my NCLEX questions :) They currently rule my life, but it's okay! I'm feeling optimistic!
current mood:  energetic
current music: John Mayer- Gravity
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| Monday, May 21st, 2007
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6:50 pm - NCLEX: Nasty Cumulation of Lousey Excuses for Xylaphones.
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I got hurt moving a patient on Thursday
Got perscribed muscle relaxants + antiinflammatorys on Thursday
Threw-up + diarrhea all Friday night into Saturday.. blood.
Went to ER Saturday morning
Graduated Saturday afternoon
Slept until 3pm today
So here I am all hopped up on my Vicadin. I studied for the NCLEX about an hour.. did 60 questions. I couldn't really concentrate but I seemed to do well anyways. This is what frustrates me: Kaplan questions I do mediocre on and Saunders questions I do well on. So ofcourse I go and buy more Kaplan questions for $79 because those questions obviously are harder and I need to torture myself. I wonder when my nursing school will send the state the list of graduates. As soon as they get my name I should get an e-mail and then I should be able to sign up for a test. Holy lord. *chest pain*
current mood:  sick
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| Monday, May 14th, 2007
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8:42 pm - "Always together, never apart. Maybe in distance but never at heart"
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I know that I am being silly and emotional but I can't help but feel a little lonely. I had such a great weekend with Jennie + my mom and now that I am 300 miles away I am really sad. I miss my best friend. Being back here really makes me realize how much I miss conversation with friends that I can really just say whatever I'm feeling without being insecure. I know that I can be completely myself and be completely insane. I feel like after the whole Rachael situation I have been robbed of being able to babble about things that I care about. I feel scared to talk about my wedding or go on and on about Zach because I don't know who I can trust or who is trashing me behind my back. I honestly just need Jennie here to roll on my floor with and not care about a single thing. Or talk about how much ribbon frustrates me... or talk about our husbands... for hours. Or hear about what she's doing/up to/feeling. It's something that you can't just replace with anything. [How could more than one person in the entire world tolerate eachother so much anyway!?] It is completely ridiculous that I have to watch "Who's wedding is it anyway?" alone. Zach is so good and he is so supportive... but ofcourse he can't be everything and no one can replace a girl's best friend.
current mood:  sentimental
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| Friday, May 11th, 2007
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1:19 pm - College is over!
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College has come to an end. Four years have passed and I can't believe it. This obviously calls for reflection! I can't believe that this time four years ago I was getting ready to graduate highschool and on my way to Buffalo for my freshman year. Buffalo feels like forever ago... I was 17! I was so young and naive.. still a little bit of those two things... haha
I have my bachlor's degree and a 3.3 GPA. I don't know when or if I'll go back to graduate school for nurse practitioner.. so this might be the end of school forever. Thats pretty freaky. Now all I have left to do is walk across the stage in my garb and pass my boards (which, since monday, I've been studying every free second)
:) I'm so excited! College was a wonderful chapter in my life and I'm really happy to see what the next chapter in my life holds. I feel as though I am on the brink of something wonderful.. a career... a marriage... life is just excellent right now :)
Going home to CT this weekend for Jennie's graduation! Yay! Also going to sign the last contract I need to for the wedding which is in 1 month and 27 days! Holy LORD.
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| Friday, April 27th, 2007
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11:16 am - Time falls away, but these small hours still remain
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The past week has been pretty stressful. Everything seems to be coming to one point... I'm getting really nervous about the NCLEX in June. I hate not knowing exactly when I'll have to take it and that it's just sprung on me when all my paperwork is in. Hopefully it is at the end of June. Wedding stuff is stressing me out to because I only have a couple things left to do and I can't seem to do it efficiently. I can only go to Connecticut two more times before the wedding, once in May and once in June. I have three appointments I need to make and I can have one when I'm there in May.. and then when I go back in June I'll probably be really busy with the bachlorette party and bridal shower that I won't have enough time to have other appointments. So! I'm getting a little stressed out. I have all the ceremony programs but I ran out of ribbon and I have to order more pressed flowers so that's just sitting around until I get around to it.
Zach and I decided to take 2 weeks off from wedding stuff, so i'm not going to do a thing until May 8, the day after my final and exactly 2 months from the big day. I feel a little relieved from that. To top it all off we are really tight financially this month, and we probably won't feel any give until I get my first NURSE paycheck in June.
I have a final coming up May 7 and a presentation next week. I don't care at all about school anymore, which scares me too, but I honestly don't care! I am fresh out of motivation. I feel tired all the time. I have definately burnt out and am ready to move out to an actual job with normal hours and no required work when I get home.
This picture makes me happy:
current mood:  stressed
current music: Rob Thomas- Little Wonders
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| Monday, April 23rd, 2007
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1:24 pm
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and i love you, i love you, i love you.... like never before
current mood: in love
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| Sunday, April 22nd, 2007
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4:32 pm - And theres this burning, just like theres always been
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Last night was the Harpur's Ferry Banquet. Liz and Evan came up from Long Island on Saturday and stayed with me and Zach. It was really fun to dress up nice and go out together! Zach looked great :) We got there and said hi to everyone.. took alot of pictures. About 20min into the cocktail hour Sean showed up. That was interesting. I didn't think he would be there since he lives in NYC and graduated last year. Ofcourse Zach gets upset and stares him down the entire night and i just feel plain awkward. It's very strange to NOT look at someone or ignore someone! I caught his glimpses at me from the courner of my eye randomly throughout the night and it just made me feel really weird. It's not neutral like I would feel looking at a stranger, there is all this history and "stuff." I guess that would make it impossible to look at him and not feel anything. I don't know how to explain it but there is so much tension between us, let alone the three of us. It makes me wonder if that will ever go away. I look at him and feel guilty for ever having feelings for him, is that strange? I am so in love with Zach and am so happy that everytime i get a hint of the past.. being with other people.. i just wish it never happened. I wish there was only always Zach. There is so much baggage with the past. With everyone's past. Especially Sean and I because it was just so freaking complicated. Being reminded of the past really brings me to look at Zach and feel so lucky. I am going to marry this amazing man, no one even compares. It makes everything and everyone i've ever encountered just look ridiculous.
I had such a great night with him! There were lots of speeches and awards. Me and Zach didn't win "Best Couple" which upsets me.. Allison and Dan won it and she cheats on him and he settles for her.. they are just not the best!!! We should have won!! But in the end a freaking little Harpur's Ferry award means absolutely nothing, especially when you compare it to wedding rings. Anyway, they honored all the seniors and they said alot of nice things about me. All of the seniors got personalized embroidered travel bags. They are really nice!
After the banquet was over we came back to our place, got changed and went downtown to this new bar called Mad Moose. It was really really cool and laid back. I really enjoyed myself! I sat there and talked with the girls for an hour or so [ofcourse Sean ended up there too.] and then left to go home, where I promptly fell asleep upon head meeting pillow :)
We have a Nursing Banquet this Friday, so another date for me and Zach!! Very excited! And by the way... 2months15days !!!
current music: Third Eye Blind- Motorcycle Driveby
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| Thursday, December 30th, 2004
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8:55 am - There are SECRETS in here!!
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- Almost all of my journal entries are friends-only...-
-So comment to be added to my friend's list!-
current mood: calm
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| Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
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1:54 pm - 100 things you probably don't know about me
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1. First off, I doubt I can think of a hundred things you don’t know about me
2. I’m the only person in my family that was born in America
3. I was born in New Haven, Connecticut
4. I moved back to Norway when I was like 6 months old and stayed there til I was 6
5. I met my boyfriend in 1st grade
6. The first thing I said to my boyfriend in 1st grade was : “DID YOU LIKE HONEY I BLEW UP THE KID??” and he said “BLEW UP?!?! I LOVED IT!!!”
7. I have worked at Geissler’s Supermarket, Friendly’s, Domino’s, Pizza Hut, an ambulance, and Media Play… and I’m on to another new job
8. I went to college my freshman year at SUNY Buffalo
9. I spent almost 1,000 to visit my boyfriend who went to school in Albany and had a job just to support my bus tickets
10. I’ve lived in 3 towns in Connecticut, 2 in New York, and 2 in Norway
11. I still talk to people I went to elementary school with
12. My best friend is Jennie Petkis! I heart you!
13. I’m blind in one eye (right one!)
14. One time my glasses flew away in a hurricane
15. My dad lives in Florida
16. My parents got divorced when I was in 4th grade
17. My 2d grade teachers name was Mrs. Assicanin.
18. Me and my friends had amazing nicknames for my 2nd grade teacher considering we were in 2nd grade
19. When I was like 10 me and my friends use to try to write down a swear word starting with every letter of the alphabet.
20. My first kiss was Jon Glassman in 4th grade
21. I am amazing at Warcraft 3
22. I got caught my by the MPAA for pirating and sharing warcraft 3
23. I’ve been to 5 proms
24. One of my prom dates took me to mcdonalds for prom dinner. Drive thru. Dollar menu… and then asked if he was gonna get any.
25. I have 4 siblings
26. I tan really easy
27. I like wreastling
28. I’m UNDEFEATED at Mario Kart Double Dash
29. I can speak 2 languages fluently and understand 3 more almost fluently
30. I love working on the ambulence
31. I want to know how to start an IV
32. I am definaltly not going to study abroad
33. I am horrible at math
34. I am triying to say “F!” instead of “FUCK!”
35. I graduated highschool a virgin
36. I know the football players on the Dolphins personally
37. I like boys with glasses
38. I’ve never dated a guy with brown eyes
39. I am really a light weight when it comes to alcohol
40. My favorite drinks are long island ice tea and sex on the beach
41. Me and Gina calculated it out, after 2.4 drinks I have a BAC% of 0.076
42. I cant wait to get out of college
43. I want to have 3 kids!
44. I can never turn down coffee excursions, EVER. No matter what time!!!
45. I heart Mark Wahlburg
46. I think Tom Cruise is only hot in Jerry McGuire
47. I don’t think Brad Pitt is hot
48. I like to go online and special order shirts and bags that say cute things!
49. I love dressing up!
50. Omg I reached 50
51. I can’t seem to learn how to crochet
52. My teacher made fun of me in middle school for almost crying while using a vertical saw thing in that tools class and screaming cuz I forgot hot to turn it off
53. I love hiking
54. I can do tricks on those little skis
55. I have been skiing since I was 6
56. I miss track and field
57. I can throw the javaline really far
58. I can throw the shot put really far and I used to compete in the event in highschool track but I stopped cuz the big fat mean girls scared me
59. I have a horrible time with closure
60. Anatomy has taken over my life
61. I know anything u want to know about Pokemon and I beat all the games
62. I wish I could paint
63. I’m lazy
64. When I get really stressed I got for a run
65. I cant wait to buy a stethascope
66. Me and my mom are really close and she knows almost everything that I do/ have done
67. I can play the clarinet
68. I love fishing so much
69. I will only eat Norwegian shrimp
70. I hold on to the past more than I should
71. I think smart guys are the sexiest thing ever
72. People’s dads tend to have the urge to tell me dirty jokes
73. I used to collect stickers and have like a millon
74. I still have all my pogs
75. Me and my little brother used to fight to the death over who would be Mario.
76. My dad broke my super nintendo my picking it up and throwing it really hard on the floor while me and my brother were fighting over who would be Mario.
77. My fish’s name is Peter
78. I am HORRIBLE at directions
79. I always bite off more than I can chew and suffer because of it but cant seem to change
80. I am decent at beer pong
81. I love dancing
82. Sports Bar is awsome
83. I’ve never cheated on a boyfriendand never will!
84. I really want to respond to a heart attack
85. I didn’t know how to spell “disease” until 3 days ago
86. Victoria’s secret is my weakness
87. I feel really special when people remember my bday
88. I am almost done with this thing
89. I don’t eat hot chocolate like normal people
90. I am obsessed with Swiss Miss
91. I have skinny dipped before
92. I’m too nice and people take advantage of me cuz of that
93. I am really tickalish and I scream like a school girl
94. Scary movies give me nightmares
95. I hate sleeping alone so I stay up really late so that when I go to bed I fall asleep right away without thinking that I am alone.
96. I love football!!!
97. Me and Jennie have our own language that no one really understands
98. I like to laugh and anyone who can make me laugh like an idiot seems to win my heart
99. I hate taco bell
100. I always get a thousand lemons in my water
101. I’m done!!!!!!!!
current mood: busy
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gurli341's journal